One of the first things parents in California think about when they decide to divorce is the impact it will have on their kids. Many believe it will devastate them and that there is no way to prevent them from experiencing an onslaught of negative emotions.
Children certainly can suffer from divorce, but family law has evolved over the years to incorporate creative options that meet the needs of children. Parents can also contribute a great deal to their kids' well-being through divorce, even when their own emotions are in turmoil. Couples working toward a child-centered divorce may even find it easier to let go of issues that typically cause conflict.
Incorporating a few practical tips into your lives during such a chaotic time can go a long way to facilitating peace and security for your kids. One of the most valuable tips revolves around how you and your co-parent treat one another. Avoid fighting, especially in front of the kids, and make sure you do not speak negatively about your spouse.
Create parenting schedules and support arrangements right away. Even if they are only temporary, dealing with these important issues early on can help your kids feel secure and loved. As a bonus, it can also free you and your spouse to focus on other critical matters such as property distribution and a more permanent child custody plan.
Finally, do not underestimate the importance of helping your children deal with their emotions. If possible, plan to tell your kids about the divorce together while assuring them that they are loved and will continue to have a loving relationship with each parent.
While the formal process of ending a marriage may begin in a family law attorney's office, expect it to overflow into your everyday lives. Focusing on the welfare of your kids provides you and your co-parent with a positive goal towards which to work.
Source: Huffington Post, "7 Secrets For A Child-Centered Divorce," Bari Zell Weinberger, accessed March 08, 2018